Are you there God? It's me, Desperate.

The less I eat, the more snarky I become as evidenced by my more recent Facebook Post:

"Boredom combined with caffeination normally results in online dating registration. I'm currently trying to resist that urge."

A family member, who borders on biblical, commented, "Food for thought: Match.com = more dates, more engagements, more marriages, MORE MURDERS!! You are way too intelligent and pretty. The right one will come along in His time."

Thankfully, I have sane-minded relatives with text messaging capabilities:

Uncle Brett: "Leave it to Jane* to get all biblical."

Me: "Right? I was just being my hysterical self. My first thought, 'wait. thought I deleted her..guess HE brought her back."

Uncle Brett: "On the 3rd day she rose again.. on Facebook."

Me: "I want to delete , but she called me pretty. So, there's that."

Uncle Brett: "Lol. always making lemonade." She's got issues. Apparently both personalities will be saved by Jesus in the end, so they can both be tools in this life."

Me: "Clad in Nike shoes and 'heaven's gate away team' armbands."

*names have been changed to respect the insane.

file under:

@ Doomsday

@ Salvation